Toys You Shouldn't Buy For Your Kid Cousin This Christmas

Christmas is just around the corner, and alot of us are already thinking about what to get for your grandma, mom, friends, brother, great-three-times-removed-uncle Bruce...etc. and soon enough you find yourself stumbling across your kid cousin. Kid cousin, huh? There are a lot of great toys out there to choose from, but there are always some which are horrible ideas-even though they might not look like it. So to help you out a little, here are some toys that you should NOT get you kid cousin*.

Easy-Bake Ultimate Oven

No more light bulbs needed on this new Easy-Bake Oven! Oook...no light bulbs? So what the heck are you inferring here?- that this is another one of those plastic play-things that little girls can use to pretend to do "adult" things? Pathetic. When I was a little monster (still am) first learning how to cook, I'm pretty sure I started to use actual kitchen utensils; with adult supervision of course. Besides, with kids' cooking classes being so popular these days-which kid would wanna turn to "pretend" things? Answer: None. Just stir water and one of the mix packets together in a bowl. This just sounds gross. What kind of food are they trying to teach the kids to make? Protein drinks? Mush feed for KFC chickens? Unless you wanna try out your cousins' baking with the help of this plastic oven, go buy them a Mrs. Fields gift card.
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Air Hogs Hawk Eye Radio

Just reading the product name gives me this uneasy feeling. A combination of two very unlikely animals, an eye and radio just doesn't convince me that the toy will be that great. Besides, the name make no sense at all- 'Hawk Eye' I get, but 'Air Hogs'...so are the pigs supposed to be as light as air? Back on topic; the helicopter apparently has a "eye" a.k.a. camera, that takes pictures and videos as it flies around the house. Already, I can see problems-BIG problems. Would you really like to have a gigantic fly following you 24/7 like the paparazzi scooping for Barney's body check? Didn't think so. Imagine your sense of privacy whenever you visit your cousin's house: Secretly picking your nose? *snap* Looking through the trash for your retainers? *snap* Falling asleep on the couch? *snap* Yep. And remember; with these snap shots and video clips, who knows what your cousin will do with them? So the next time you see your relatives giggling and elbowing each other when you walk in, you know what happened.
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Brain Quest

Checklist: Educational? Check. Gets you praises from the parents? Check. Fun? Mehhhh...somewhat. What can I say-if it's educational there's usually little "fun" in the game. Let's face it-this "game" looks more like a very thick handbook for school or something. In another words, it's best if it's used for classroom uses ONLY. Maybe you don't like your cousin all that much, but hey, if they're gonna play with this thing they're gonna play it with you the next time you come visit. This thing is like an encyclopedia of questions to annoy you with-you know those road trip questions like; "Why is the sky blue?" and "Why are the cows spotted when some aren't?" AND "How come I always feel hungry?". Yeah...you get the idea, but it doesn't stop there, with the answers printed beneath the questions, there will be a lot more blabbering going on NON-STOP. But look on the bright side-you won't ever need a radio again.
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I Am T-Pain Mic

This is quite simple; ask yourselves: Are you or your family or your cousin's family (especially the parents) very fond of T-Pain? Love listening to your cousin sing? Love being disturbed in your quiet reading time? If answered yes to the preceding questions-then go ahead and get your cousin this plastic 40 dollar mic. If not...DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. Have you seen the commercial? Well you should HERE. I was pretty horrified even when the mom starting using the mic-the kids in the commercial were probably just too stunned when they saw their own mom singing in auto tune with "T-Pain" style. Base line: If listening to your kid cousin sing isn't enough, then go ahead and get them the make-believe mic, to add a little "T-Pain" flair in their singing for the holidays. 
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*Based on Candy's opinions...

The Official Cashew, OJ & Bacon Loving Day

Happy National Cashew Day! Yep-you got that right, it really is National Cashew Day, strange isn't it?-A day dedicated to a kidney-shaped nut? Minus as well make a day dedicated to sundaes (oh wait, they already did that)! So to celebrate this national loving cashew day, here's a short video on how these cashews (or nuts in general) are processed. Oh, and just in case you're bored, here are two more food-related videos from How It Is Made. Enjoy! :D

After watching all this, doesn't it make you hungry? Sure does, sure does....

Most Annoying Cartoon Characters of All Time

I don't know if you notice this, but some cartoon/anime characters are EXTREMELY annoying. I'm not even kidding. I mean, how the heck do they get away with it after all these years? Maybe their cuteness covers it all...meh...

Here are the top 5 that bothers me a whole lot-but don't get me wrong, I still like them and all, it's just that they annoy me.

Pikachu

Yeah, sure it's cute, it's a fat yellow mouse-who wouldn't melt over that? But haven't you noticed? The only thing that ever comes out of its mouth is "Pikachu" or "Pika". Seriously? So basically all it ever says is it's own name over and over and over again. Ugh. So it's like me saying my name repeatedly. Hmmm...ok let's try that out. "Candy Candy Candy Candy Candy Candy" OMGSH I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE! And imagine trying to have a conversation with him...yeah...How does Ash and his other pokemon friends ever tal-oh wait. All the other pokemon talk like this too (except for a few)...

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"The Man"

For those of you who don't know, he's the guy from Pink Panther  who always gets his plans foiled by Pink Panther. I know, I know; that the only reason for his existence is so that he could be the laughing stock of the show. Every ending is basically the same, something unfortunate happens to him all because of Pink. But ya can't blame the panther, cuz the man always tries to do something back. Ok, get real, over 200 episodes, you still haven't learned your lesson and still try to get back at Pink, even though you know it's NEVER gonna work? *sigh* Humans...

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Nyan Cat

This is self-explanatory. Just go and watch him HERE.

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Squidward

There's something about him that ALWAYS bug me when I watch Spongebob Squarepants. Maybe it's his face? His expression? Hobby? Voice? I dunno, he just annoys me. Sometimes I think he's the one who basically ruins the entire show. On the other hand you can't entirely blame him, when you live beside two idiots who never shut up 24/7, had such a boring childhood, failed your career and have a nose that look like a mutated sea cucumber; you can't help but be sarcastic and gloomy in every show. Squidward-try putting a smile once in awhile (no not the ugly one), they say it helps relieve your stress.

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Cosmo & Timmy

Oh. My. Gawd. It's their voices. Cosmo and Timmy sound like a bunch of broken toys or the extremely annoying mosquitos that fly around your ears; the ones you could never kill. Yeah I'm not even trying to be sarcastic because this is what they really sound like, so minus as well do the sound effects for a documentary about the West Nile Virus. I don't know if you notice it or not, when Cosmo and Timmy speaks, neither of them use any expression in their voices, which makes them monotone, MOSQUItone. Very annoying. Hurts my head and makes me wanna scratch my mosquito bites all over again.

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